This issue brought to you by Jim Beam, the Azrael to Jack Daniel’s Batman.
I am a disenfranchised holder of a Bachelor’s Degree in English who loves mainstream superhero comics, not to mention whiskey, a little too much. I will try really, really hard not to cuss too much and be a terrible person and make this a thing that your ten-year-old could get in trouble for reading, because I believe that comic books should be a thing for kids to enjoy at least as much, if not more than, teens and adults. My bias is as follows: The only thing I hate more than post-Civil War Marvel is DC’s floundering attempts to stay true to their core ideals while updating themselves for a new generation. In that way they kind of remind me of the Democratic Party. Zing! Anyway, I hope you enjoy. This ‘zine is rated PG-13 for misanthropy and at least one sex joke that goes too far. Every issue. Guaranteed.
Single Malt Scotch: A perfect recipe. A generations-old process. Makes me feel warm inside.
Four Whiskey Sours: Oh yes. Just enough. This is a classic. I feel good.
Three Vodka Collins: Tasty! I’d like to have some more of that.
Two Cups Gin & Juice: Inoffensive, yet afterwards I only feel sleepy.
One Shot of Bacardi 151: Pffft! What are you trying to do, kill me?!
Aristocrat Tequila: I have nothing left to live for. Self-destruction is my only remaining goal.
5 months ago